But you said my tits were nice, and according to you, you had never seen any before." Len was smiling now, having got one over on me. I had to concede that one."Yes OK. But your tits were nice, they happen to be attached to a nice person." Len said nothing, just blushed prettily and quietly said."Thank you Danny."The next day, we spent with Len showing me around London. Now it may appear silly, having lived just twenty miles away until I was fifteen, but I had never visited London as a tourist.. "Just some drunk guy asking for a push," he answers."Did you help him?" she asks."No, I did not, it's 3 in the morning and it's frigin' well pouring rain out there!" Well, you have a short memory," says his wife. "Can't you remember about three months ago when we broke down and those two guys helped us? I think you should help him and you should be ashamed of yourself! God loves drunk people too you know."The man does as he's told, gets dressed and goes out into the pounding rain.He calls out. " she smiled"Well, it seems the lad was bitten square in the middle of his scrotum, and already his testes are swollen to the size of..." I cast about for a suitable simile... "to the size of those guava melons over there", pointing to a nearby bush with several large fruits laden on its low branches."And you need me to reduce the swelling somehow, am I correct, my lovebird and protector?" In words of one syllable, yes." What do you recommend, oh dear one?" Well, it would seem that the quickest. The confusion on her face was priceless; until she saw me smile, I guess she just can't stand the thought of me being happy because she snapped, "I don't want the neighbors to think we are slobs!" And thankfully she was gone.I sat and thought about it; maybe one or two more sessions with my dabbing her lips might do the trick. As to doing something around the house and what the neighbors thought, fuck them, the house was clean, the yard was trimmed, the garbage contained. Our house didn't look.
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